My new Windows 7 laptop is racist. What should I do?

I was really excited to get my new laptop with Windows 7 for my birthday. However recently my new laptop seems to be defective since it seems I received a racist laptop. Every time it loads up to the login screen I can distinctly hear the laptop call me the b word. When I try to run too many applications at once a pop-up error comes up that says "Relax b*aner and eat some tacos while your applications loads". Also when I click a program too many times and it doesn't open it gives me another pop-up error saying "Relax b*aner and mow my creator's lawn while your application loads". My Mozilla Firefox browser opens up to a Border Patrol homepage every time I load it, and my favorites are filled with white supremacy and border patrol websites even though I never added them. When I change my laptop's wallpaper it changes it back to the confederate flag. the final straw came today when I tried to buy a movie on Windows Media, and I received a error saying that "Windows Media Guidelines prohibits the use of gang and stolen money for purchases in the Windows Media store". Now I am convinced that my laptop is racist and I am trying to figure out what should I do?